♥mY sWeEt.gLoSsY.MuLtiCoLoReD SuGaRLaNd♥

♥CHANGE?!…that’s what I thought, certain situations can change the direction of your life, even words can change how you think forever….this year, there has been, well, you can say good and bad things that happened to me. I mean as if that never happens, specially in my life…one day you feel that everything seems in place then the next thing you knew…POOF!* it’s all so different…but I believe that everything happens for a reason. Not that God doesn’t want us to be happy, we have our own stories to write, let’s just say God has written a couple of endings for us…we just need to choose which one we’ll end up with…life is like a big puzzle to solve…but not just a cheap puzzle though, a good example would be "JUMANJI" or "ZATHURA" (you’ll know what i mean, if you watched the flick) It’s like you’re trying to get out of every sticky sitch but you realize and cherish things @ the same time….well, ain’t life that grand?! sometimes we never see things in a different perspective and never thanked God for all of these things that happened to us, may it be pleasurable or agonizing, we have to admit, we all learned something from it…didn’t we?♥

Well…we all strive to do things everyday, and I’d say we all deserve to be happy in some ways….I am just thankful that I passed this year, more than what I am before, in a good way, I’d say. And I’m glad i took the risk and gave myself a goddamn chance again…hello! capital L?! falling in ♥L-O-V-E♥…just looking at him makes me feel that every thing’s gonna be just so, alright…even if i’m in a whirls and twirls at some point, no one’s changed me but him, he’s the only one who can equalize my entire being(whooosh!) i’ll quit babbling now….just want to post how i feel and how sometimes things are just so screwed up and there’s this one soul who saves the day for you, even if you just don’t get it…what a charm…♥

Just today Kitkat coached Bert and I…I know that, most of things that she’s gonna tell me is about the metrics and what I need to do to get back to my old working self…It was pretty cool that in my 2nd day of taking in calls…I got a good CSAT of 5 (can you believe that?!) so that was sweet! i mean who would’nt cry after 1 month of going offline and then here you go being fed to the lions again? …anyway, i still love going back to that dangerous, unpredictable world…coz i have everything there…my life (sat sun off!), my baby (bert!), my money (commission!), good lord! (Church every sundays!), my family (quality time!), and my friends (team ding!)…i never realized what i have til Kitkat told us (me and bert) that she was lucky to have us in the team and that we compliment each other and explained what we did that made her actually a follower of our love…hehe! though i went back to taking in calls…i realized  that i am one blessed chick because i was one of the 19 agents that got the increase! ( topshop here i come!) .. i am just thankful that even if all of the things are happening he never fails to provide…i am one happy gal just to have family, friends and of course the person i am so willing to spend my entire life with…and i am luvin every part of it….back to my soul once more and into my world…♥

♥"Sophia" by Nerina Pallot♥

Five o’ clock and a fire escape symphony
Spilling out across the road and the square
And the sky’s the same as your own, do you think of me?
Do the parks and trees and the leaves reach you there?
After the rain, in the lonely hours he haunts me….
Calling out, again, and again….
Sophia, Sophia, I’m burning, I’m burning
It’s a fire, a fire I cannot put out.
Sophia, Sophia, I’m learning that some things
I can’t go without
And one of those is him.

And now I walk these streets like a stranger in my home town,
Learn the language, form the words when I speak.
But he changed me, I’m his ghost since he came around
Now I count the hours, and the days and the weeks…..
In passion and silence,
Every word, every line a measure
It’s the science of the soul.
And his books, they breathe a reason
And now, I want to know…..
Sophia, Sophia, I’m burning, I’m burning
It’s a fire, a fire I cannot put out.
Sophia, Sophia, I’m learning that some things
I can’t go without
And one of those is him.

And you, with your new born eyes,
Have you ever loved a man like I love him?
Do you hurt, but still feel alive
Like never before?
Oh Sophia! Sophia!
Sophia, Sophia, I’m burning, I’m burning
It’s a fire, a fire I cannot put out.
Sophia, Sophia, I’m learning that some things
I can’t go without
I can’t go without him.

We had a road trip last sept 30 to Calauag, Quezon after 15 years finally the record was broken….I was tired had no sleep at all but I’m happy I went ahead…I’m even happier that my baby came along with us, we had a few stop by’s at some friend’s house whom we haven’t seen in quite awhile then we checked in to this hotel that looks like they’re located in China..Why?? well i guess it’s because before you reach your designated room you’d have to climb approximately 50 freakin’ stairs! By the time you’ve reached the top you’d be looking for the guy who designed the place and KIIIILLLLL him! stupid idea….it added up to the feeling of wastedness…but anyway, me and baby slept for a couple of hours then came the big event, had a few drinks, laughs and the program was fun so I’d say it was indeed a success…the next day, we went to St.Peter’s church then had a few stop by’s stuffed ourselves with food courtesy of Uncle Cadz (and i don’t mean just food…im talking abt crab, shrimp, crispy pata, and lechon….ugh!) and again back to the road….we stopped at San pablo, Laguna where my aunt lives…haha we emptied up her fridge and food stock hehe she gave us boxful of lanzones and rambutan…(that’s why she hates knowing that we’ll drop by @ her place!) ….haaaayy! It was a pretty pretty long and tiring ride only to find out that when we got home we don’t have electricity….Nice one huh? Even so, I’m happy I went back to my hometown…It was certainly amazing….

can you even believe i spent the entire day sleeping?! well not really but…what i meant is that there’s no idle time for me (like just looking at the ceiling thinking of what to do) i don’t get that feeling anymore man….Apparently, I was awakened by a call from my "sweet gum drop" who got a bit upset since he was waiting for me @ home…my stoopidly stoopid phone didnt sound the alarm even if i did set it (DAMN!) —>guess you could imagine the next picture huh….he threw a tantrum (aaawwwww!)…-Loved it-…as for me…i ended up in a pressurized rush…experimented if i could commute (to save some penny!..instead of a cab…again) wow…SUPERwoman? Nah…I can say that I am that kid in an all dressed-up running mode!!! haHAha!!! Stupid Dumb Half-Chinese Girl! i got there just in time…not too late, not too early i’d say..Threw him a question–"Are you mad baby?" he was like, "Not really.." I was like.."Well…i got here without a cab…in one piece!" (pathetic ain’t it?) i guess i’d do it more often… We ended up watching tv, just cuddling and eating for the rest of the night…and honey was it gratifying…SWEET.

lyne and I went out last saturday night…we went shopping -which is our most favorite thing to do.. :)- then went straight ahead to 22nd st…well i admit it was kinda pathetic we dont have nowhere to go but…who cares anyway? well it wasnt really what we were trippin on in the fist place..but hey! it was a stress-bustin night…we popped out ears out with loud gay singers…and laughed so hard we nearly shit our pants out…waited for Ms. Anton Diva to show what he/she’s got and we called it a night….well, what can i say?…overall?  not bad..not bad..

♥Today is my off and I’m like…i wanna go out and drink but i thought it would probably be a bit nicer to stay home just watch dvd….whatever…i mean i’m gonna have a stress free day and why not chill? anyway, i’d love to spend more time in my room and just clean it but then there’s a better way to spend the day..shopping!!! hahaha…oh lord…this is as good as it’s gonna get..Ü

just came home from bellevue hotel….stayed there with my baby for 3 days and 2 nights….i would have never enjoyed staying in bed, just chillin, watchin tv, telling stories, saying how you feel, kissing and making love for the past 2 1/2 days if i didn’t spend it with the very person that i love…sounds unbelievable…but i love it! i love everything…every single moment, the weather, the place (as if it wasn’t fun enough we were given an executive suite…bonus!) watched a scary movie (SUKOB) and i liked it whenever he makes fun of me whenever i scream and makes comments about the movie! we drank tequila and beer…ate pizzas….got drunk…got happy…and still happy! …just wanna enjoy each and every cellular moment with him as much as i could…the fact that i have him gives me pure joy, comfort and complete happiness (like walking in a wide field of flowers dancing in the feel of the wind…and just breathing the fresh air beside the mountain)…i have him now and i will keep him…one way or another…. i promise….i love you

I find the map and draw a straight line
Over rivers, farms, and state lines
The distance from here to where you’d be
It’s only finger-lengths that I see
I touch the place where I’d find your face
My finger in creases of distant dark places

I hang my coat up in the first bar
There is no peace that I’ve found so far
The laughter penetrates my silence
As drunken men find flaws in science

Their words mostly noises
Ghosts with just voices
Your words in my memory
Are like music to me

I’m miles from where you are,
I lay down on the cold gound
I, I pray that something picks me up
And sets me down in your warm arms

After I have travelled so far
We’d set the fire to the third bar
We’d share each other like an island
Until exhausted, close our eyelids
And dreaming, pick up from
The last place we left off
Your soft skin is weeping
A joy you can’t keep in

I’m miles from where you are,
I lay down on the cold gound
And I, I pray that something picks me up
and sets me down in your warm arms

And miles from where you are,
I lay down on the cold gound
and I, I pray that something picks me up
and sets me down in your warm arms

happy me…meal…[haha!] i guess everything pays off if you just hold on to it…look how far we’ve come my baby [hmm...is this line from a song or what?!] i love my boyfriend, really and well, no one can ever, ever change that….coz if you gotta bust some asses…then you gotta bust some asses..i am fuckin tired but i am so happy, and i gotta admit, it’s just makin me so weak. i hate the feeling that there’s this someone who can make you feel destructible, and that’s the irony of it all. you love and hate at the same shitty time. but oh well, who cares, that’s just me…"i love him so much that it makes me numb, and that’s a good thing, coz if i can feel how much i really love him….i would’ve killed myself…" being so overwhelmed with the feeling you’d eat firecrackers for this person..ha! stupid but true! goddamn it! …..so so so ironic… i love you so much….just fuck off whoever.